Rough Stone Rolling

The other evening my daughter and I watched ”Hitch” again, a family favorite. At one point, while giving advice to a client, the lead character (played by Will Smith) said, “Begin each day as if it were on purpose.” That line really stood out for me. It reminded me of President Monson’s most recent address, “May We So Live” where he said:

“Our opportunities to give of ourselves are indeed limitless, but they are also perishable. There are hearts to gladden. There are kind words to say. There are gifts to be given. There are deeds to be done. There are souls to be saved… Because life is fragile and death inevitable, we must make the most of each day.”

It turned my thoughts to my family and the path we’re taking. My wife and I both work, and between that, commuting, shuttling Miss D, running errands, and doing tasks and chores, there’s little time to be living in the moment. Obviously we’re missing out on some great opportunities and life lessons. In D&C 104 it reads:

78 And again, verily I say unto you, concerning your debts–behold it is my will that you shall pay all your debts.

79 And it is my will that you shall humble yourselves, and obtain your blessing by your diligence and humility and the prayer of faith.

80 And inasmuch as you are diligent and humble, and exercise the prayer of faith, behold I will soften the hearts of those to whom you are in debt, until I shall send means unto you for your deliverance.

81 Therefore write speedily to New York and write according to that which shall be dictated by my Spirit; and I will soften the hearts of those to whom you are in debt, that it shall be taken away out of their minds to bring affliction upon you.

82 And inasmuch as ye are humble and faithful and call upon my name, behold, I will give you the victory.

Save for our new home and one of our cars (which is almost paid off), we’re not really burdened by finacial debt, but more so by the debt of time. Because L. works she doesn’t have free time to spend at home, and because both she and I work a distance from the house, we owe too much time to wasteful commuting. So we become very jealous of the time at home we do get– with ourselves– than in thinking about and serving others.

Recently, a friend shared this story with me:

I have a friend who bought a business. A short time later he suffered catastrophic reverses. There just didn’t seem to be any way out for him, and finally it got so bad that he couldn’t sleep. So, for a period of time he followed the practice of getting up about three o’clock in the morning and going to the office. There, with a paper and a pen he would ponder and pray and write down every idea that came to him as a possible solution or a contribution to the solution of his problem. It wasn’t long before he had several possible directions that he could go, and it was not much longer than that until he had chosen the best of them. But he had earned an extra bonus. His notes showed, after going over them, that he had discovered many hidden resources that he had never noticed before. He came away more independent and successful than ever he would have been if he hadn’t suffered those reverses.

There’s a lesson in that. A year or two later he was called to preside over a mission in one of the foreign lands. His business was so independent and well set-up that when he came back he didn’t return to it. He just has someone else managing it, and he is able to give virtually all of his time now to the blessing of others.

I’m feeling the call to repair my family’s situation– that with humility and diligence and a strong, persistent prayer of faith we can be relieved of spending so much time where it doesn’t matter. By going to the Lord with this focus, and with a promise to serve more abundantly, I could unearth ways to significantly increase my income– in a much closer workplace (perhaps at home!)– and enable my wife to stay at home. This reparation alone would eradicate a gaggle of time-gobblers and spawn a myriad of blessings. Begin each day as if it were on purpose…

Tune in.

We quietly announced our impending move to a few friends at church Sunday and the word spread like typhus. Just short of our 19th anniversary in the ward, we were met with explosions of surprise, excitement, disbelief, dyspepsia and dread– at times a mosaic of all the above, especially with church leaders whose frozen smiles couldn’t cover for the distress in their eyes. The bishop was particularly complimentary: “I don’t know what I’m going to do; you’ve become a large part of my life.”

We have about 3-4 more weeks here (escrow closes on the 30th) and there’s much I want to do with my calling before we leave. For example, I want to secure second and third Sunday priesthood teachers (my fourth Sunday guy is already perfect). So far the brethren have been pretty slippery, but I’ll get ‘em. I don’t want to leave my successor scrambling to make assignments every week. It sucks.

I also need to find good homes for the 13 families I home teach. Ack!

One of the perks of being an exiting HPGL is you have some influence in suggesting your successor (just how much influence, I’m not sure) and I am definitely taking my opportunity to overhaul the leadership. Currently, my 1st assistant is the Alexander Haig of the High Priest Group. For as long as we’ve worked together, I’ve felt his gaze on the GL chair (as 1st assistant to the previous GL, I suspect he felt it was supposed to be his next). For what it’s worth– and that’s a lot– he’s a good, hard worker and wingman. It’s just sometimes his desire for authority and recognition peeks through and makes me very uncomfortable. Let me see if I can illustrate: Emphasizes his role in various activities; takes it upon himself to make decisions on quorum issues when I’m not in the room; jumps the chain of communication by personally going to higher-ups so they can see how on-the-ball he is; gestures like Teddy Roosevelt while addressing the brethren when stake leaders are present. Basically, he runs for office. And this may be unfair, but I don’t want the next GL to be someone who wants it so badly.

I’ll admit, when I was first approached with the calling, I was flattered by what I perceived as a placement of prestige and trust. But soon after, when reality slammed (rode hard, put away wet), it was sobering and humbling. “Prestige” doesn’t remotely enter my mind anymore. In fact, being called to make the sacrament programs looks like a really good gig again.

It’s not really an epidemic as far as I can see, but I’ll bet there’s a breed of “calling aspirers” in every ward. Sometimes it’s for themselves, sometimes for their husbands. I know most wives are pretty normal about their spouses’ callings– annoyed even, since they take them away from sharing the essential grind at home. Still, there are the peacocks (we can see you!). Not my wife, of course. Whatever pride she manages to muster gets pulverized whenever I make what I think is a humorous remark or perform in a ward talent show (frankly, I thought lip-syncing and dancing to “Build Me Up Buttercup” in an orange jumpsuit, hair net and leg chains was clever). Look up long-suffering, you’ll find a picture of L next to the definition.

If I learned anything from this last calling, it’s be humble, be diligent, be prayerful and be faithful. And when you finally are released, always look painfully busy whenever the bishop or stake president walks by.